10. A confession of your choice

This blog is rife with confessions – horrible moments of eating distress, conflict and other things that I put on the internet for some reason. So why not, instead, throw out some mini confessions instead.

10. I think I am becoming more hair than girl recently.

9. I am very feminine because dressing like a boy looks very wrong on me. And I have the hat and clingfilm to prove it.

8. I haven’t worn shoes in my house in over a week.

7. About every 24 months, I decide it is a good idea to take up knitting again. I usually give up before anything is finished.

6. Often times, I am guilty of being a complete and utter bitch and I don’t realise until it is too late. But I will try my best to make it up.

5. I have put on around 60lbs in the last 18 months and I am trying my best to be fine with that. Some days I feel. More and more, I succeed.

4. I am becoming increasingly cynical with age. If anyone has the ability to make me believe in fairytale love again will surely have my heart.

3. Sometimes, people become exceedingly uncomfortable when I mention that I am a member of Out in UL or when I have a strong opinion on LGBT rights. I will never hide this because joining was one of the best decisions of my life thus far.

2. I love Disney movies. Unashamedly.

1. There are moments where I completely hate my life, my past and myself. But I wouldn’t change it for the world because every day makes us stronger.

9. Your favorite television program, and why.

I watch a lot of TV. A lot of it is repeats. By which I, of course, mean: Scrubs, Friends, Frasier. At the same time, I usually just have it on for background noise – but I can still pull out a decent reference when need be.

I love hospital shows – House and Grey’s Anatomy are on the top of the list for the female members of the Stewart family. These days I like picking out the medical terms I understand and trying to figure out treatment plans in my head – this way I can rationalise that it counts as study.

Dr. Who. I was against it for so long. And now I find myself waiting for a blue box, fearing stone angels and working out the River/Doctor timeline so it makes the tiniest bit of sense. Something about fantasy shows – it is so much easier to just lose yourself and life’s petty little disappoints and problems for an hour when you are trying to get your head around what exactly a Time War might entail.

Then, when it gets right down to it, I bang on Spongebob Squarepants. Altogether now.

Whooooooooo…Lives in a pineapple under the sea?

6. A photo of something you love in your room.

I started this challenge a while back, was faithful to it for the first 5 days and then proceeded to completely forget about it. But my perfectionist ways cannot just let this hang. So we shall strive on.

I have had my whiteboard for almost three years and this has been on it since almost the beginning. It is something I refuse to clean off and I’m pretty sure that it is so embedded at this point, that I couldn’t, even if I wanted to. It was one of those weeks where I had decided that I needed a little extra motivation to stay on my “diet” so I had scrawled phrases like “Too fat” and “Do not eat” on my white board. Only in French, so my parents wouldn’t be all “Wtf?”

Sinead, my best friend, did speak French and proceeded to wipe my board down, give me a hug and write the message below. And so it will continue to be a permanent part of my room.

5. A letter to your best friend.

Hey you,

I love you more than anyone in the world and I believe it has been that way for just over seven years. I love how we have private jokes like other best friends do. I extra love the fact that we seem to renew our private jokes yearly.

You have been the most supportive and amazing friend I have ever had in my entire life. You kept me from being the creepy loner in school, you taught me maths, you didn’t make fun when I cried in the Coach (or in French class, for that matter.) You were the best English buddy and room mate a girl could ever ask for. You made me more confident. You made me eat. You took care of me when I was sick with a broken heart. You took care of me when I was sick with a wheat intolerance (and that was plenty.) We have shared secrets and biscuit cake and boys more times than I can count. You are my sister from another mister, my ho that comes before bros.

Once again, I love you more than anyone else in the entire world. And I am truly sorry that I don’t always act like it.

Your other half,

K