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Well, kids. Seasons greetings. Clearly, I hate making eye contact. And I am experimenting with new sound recording so that explains the quality. But I do love you all, and I say so in a horrendously lame manner. Beaucoup d’amor 
It is apparently impossible to make even the slightest of turns at this time of year without being harassed, either through the internet or print media, to change one’s sinful and damaging ways. A plethora of information on how to quit smoking, lose weight, run 5 marathons and create world peace seems increasingly inevitable to invade the consciousness. And whilst promoting all these wonderful things is equally as wonderful as their respective results, it is all a little absurd. Let’s take weight loss.
I’d assume about 75% of people, in between their third helping of turkey and ham and the obligatory half bottle of wine at some point between Christmas Eve and New Year’s day, waylay any possible guilt with the simple phrase “I’ll lose it in the New Year.” Then January 1st hits, the house is stocked with Weight Watchers and Slimfast, the gym membership securely attained and the resolution of two simple words “Lose Weight” firmly embedded in one’s mind. That new diet plan to lose 20 lbs in two weeks, or whatever other unfathomable promise was floating around in any other number of magazines, has been memorised and intention is set. Surely this is enough.
It is also around this time of year that I start avoiding the gym. Claustrophobically full, it is too easy to get frustrated with the ones strolling along for twenty minutes before stuffing themselves with Cadbury’s finest (assured that they have indeed burnt all the necessary calories) or even easier to become overwhelmed with discomfort, unease and terror as some or other first timer boots a treadmill up to 14kmh and you wait for the sickening moment where they go flying and you simultaneously forget all your first aid training. Luckily, most people have given up by February and the gym resumes its usual atmosphere.
I seem unreasonably harsh and judgemental, an embodiment of Ms. Listen-to-Me McHolier-Than-Thou. Don’t worry, I am still the neurotic chocoholic up-and-down mess you all know and love (who herself wouldn’t hurt from a few changes this season) but I just find the entire concept of New Year’s Resolutions just a tad pointless. There is a reason why resolutions don’t last – they are vague, impulsive, non-commital and entirely dependant on the New Year to make a start. And just as quickly as one embarks on a new endeavour, something or other takes precedent and all good deeds fade away as quickly as the December frost. I mean, really, if something is that important, why wait until January to start? Goals such as losing weight and quitting smoking and what have you are lifestyle changes, not short lived fads to be played around with for 6 weeks before reverting back to your old ways. So this January, don’t think up some random resolution to “Get Firmer* in 4 Weeks” or vaguely “Learn a musical instrument.” Set a goal, be specific, make a plan and commit!
My Goals For 2011
- Be Kinder To Myself – this involves maintaining a healthy weight (without binge or starve,) getting enough exercise (without killing myself) and getting a serious hold on nasties like fat talk and body checks. Here’s to a healthy 2011!
- Run the 10K in the Great Limerick Run – Pa is supposed to do this with me (He traded off doing a mini-triathlon with him, which I also have to see to believe.) If not, I always have my sexy new micoach pacer.
- Climb Croagh Patrick – Supposed to do this last summer but didn’t. I figure I just need to nag Dad back into the gym with me. Hint hint.
- See more of family and friends – I actually go months without seeing some people. That is just not right. And I am aware that this has that horrible vagueness which I was talking about. But I can’t seem to be more specific…
- Get my music act together. This involves making a set list, getting that set list to a performable standard, convincing someone to hire me and getting some well needed experience. I will post as this progresses.
- Blog/Journal/Meditate at least twice a week – I will do this if it kills me. For it is good for my soul.
What are your goals for the new year?
*As a sidenote, I hate, loath and despise the word “firmer” for a reason I can’t quite put my finger on. Perhaps it has something to do with a seemingly healthier approach to the more controversial “skinny” without the rather negative model-diet connotations. But in the context of January’s obsession with losing pounds and inches, its essentially the same insane message of thin=happy. Make health your goal people.
**As a second sidenote, the ridiculous and self indulgent pomposity of the writing today comes to you courtesy of Kate: Obsessively reading Stephen Fry’s Autobiography for the last seven days.
Today was the day to get back on track. And not in the “oh no, I’m getting too faaaat!” way that I would have usually, but more like, four solid days of eating non-stop sugar and ham (not together) is making my body scream out for mercy. I suppose that’s what I get for eating 2 selection boxes, a very large portion of a tin of roses and keeping a fairly constant eating-on-the-hour routine going on. So I complied. 14 hours of sleep later, porridge for breakfast and salad for lunch and I feel mighty better. It’s nice to get an endorphin hit without the sugar coma that follows.
I also went for a run (my first bit of exercise in 4 days!) Accompanying me was my sexy new micoach pacer. I think I’m in love. Whilst I love the buzz of running and getting outside and moving, there is quite a sense of satisfaction in knowing how far you went (a short 2.2 miles) and how fast you were going (avg 6:55 min/km (not good) but there was walking involved in the interval workout). Just the thing to get me out of my rut 
Yoga was also on the cards and I am nicely refreshed to go see Gulliver’s Travels with my mom in a while. Laters alligators
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the eve
Calamities occuring you wouldn’t believe,
The shower was frozen, the front door was stuck,
But Kate didn’t mind (she got off early from work.)
The pipes were all frozen from sub zero degrees
But nobody cared because Elf’s on tv!
The oven is buzzing, the heater’s making an odd sound
But who would notice with the smell of cooking ham all around?
The car wouldn’t start, our feet frozen to the soles
But all was made better by Milky Way Crispy Rolls
So anticipate surprises and trousers too tight
So from my laptop (in my onesie) to all a good night!
Yesterday I baked my own body weight in Christmas cookies. Three types of dough: gingerbread, chocolate-dip chocolate-chip dough balls and various chocolate dipped sugar cookies (in festive Christmas shapes.) The family were pleased to say the least. And I got one hell of an upper arm workout. If there is one thing I have an edge on, it is baking cookies. Hope they were well received
In running news, Monday was the most horrible run I have ever embarked upon. I was excited to go for my run and started out on my usual 2 mile route, same as always. Then about a mile in, I had to stop. Okay, I think, quick walking break and I’ll be fine. Then I start and have to stop again. Eventually I am so disheartened, I plod home, fit to cry. Because all my black and white brain could think was “You can’t run anymore. Fail on you.”
Yesterday I was afraid to run, lest there was a repeat incident. So I made do with an hour of intervals. Today, I wasted half my morning just trying to make myself do something, anything, because I was in one of those moods where everything seems like too much effort. I though about going to the gym but the thought of walking there seemed excruciating. So eventually I plucked up the courage to go out for another run. But this time, I would do a new route. Basically, I ran to the very back of the industrial estate and back. In-there-abouts of three miles. In what Dad later informed me was -10 degrees. Lovely. My face couldn’t move. High on endorphins, I sealed all the goodness in with an hour of yoga before I got ready for work.
So I suppose the lesson here is not to give up so easily. Or maybe, one should change their running route before the thought of the old one makes you want to die.
Whilst I am not quite 100%, I no longer feel like I am in a completely stagnant rut, doomed to repeat myself until the end of time. I now feel like I can accept the bad days, relish the increasingly good days and altogether change. Its still a slow process but it doesn’t seem completely redundant anymore.
Reasons To Feel Good
- It’s Christmas in 7 days!!! I am particularly excited this year because for the first time in a long time there was no particlar request for an item under the tree so its all a big surprise. I die in anticipation.
- I got through my week of drinking 8 glasses of water a day (a small achievement but an achievement nonetheless)
- I quite like my new job. And usually, I hate all jobs besides performing or teaching. But retail ain’t that bad.
- Even though I am working Christmas Eve, Elf is on when I get home. I have already seen Elf twice this holiday season and I am still excited to see it again.
- Dinner at lunch time is excellent. Like, really really excellent.
- I got through a Thursday without a binge. This is MIGHTY.
- I can hold a plank for aaaaaaaaaaages.
- My heels are creeping more and more to the floor in Downward Dog.
- I have excellent teachers and friends and family surrounding me.
- Did I mention CHRISTMAS?!?!
Apologies for such a mundane post. I am boring when I am not moping.
It was a good day. Between my first run after the bad knee (best 15 minutes of the last 2 weeks. Short but awesome.) and the consistent layer of sparling snow, making even mundane suburbia a little beautiful, I was all ready to get in the Christmas spirit. In accordance with Farmer’s Day (well… the day of the immaculate conception. But I’m a heathen.) we got festive and decorated. Little Sister and I were up at the crack of dawn (well… that’s a lie. I was up. But I decided breakfast and yoga were far more important. Then banking and Centra. But after that.) and off to cleaning we went. We were a flurry of lifting, sorting, tidying, dusting and sweeping. I even moved couches instead of just going around them. The house was ready.
Next came the trip to the attic. Dad took the lead, for as we all know, a woman’s place is not in the attic. A woman’s place is holding the ladder and then catching the very heavy boxes only to leave them drop clunkily to the floor. Which totally didn’t happen to me…
Amidst frustrating fairy lights, a plethora of Santa hats and many a candle holding decoration, it was done. And I have the pictures to prove it.
Behold, the goth tree. It’s essentially a spiral of darkness. Finally, internet proof to my friends that my family promotes black christmas trees. That’s how we roll.
Aforementioned candle holders.
The haunted crib. See that angel? For years, Dad claimed it just flew off at im. We laughed. Suuuuuuuure, Dad. Until it happened to me today. This is what I get for all my talk of “evolution.”
The cute, non-haunted crib.
Snowman the first.
Snowman the second.
Snowman the third, happily hanging out on the stereo. We like snowmen.
Mom’s doll. She has had this doll for 20 years and continues to be her favourite christmas item. She may love it more than me. And yes, the eyes are drawn on with a biro.
Me, chilling in my santa hat. I’m aware of the state I’m in. I wasn’t leaving the house. I swear, how I survived the first 17 years of my life without boy’s fatmans, I’ll never know.
Trifecta of bears!
Yet more snowmen!
Very precariously placed on the windowsill.
The christmas bears of my childhood. Decorations may come and go, gifts may be forgotten, but the bears will remain. The bears will return.
Happy december!
X
Even though our holidays were extended by two days (THANK YOU SNOW!) it still feels like Xmas has snuck up on us. Impossible that it is Xmas Eve tomorrow, although there it is, stretched out in front of us in all its festive glory. I’ve been preparing for weeks, carolling, shopping, trademark penguin earrings and yet it still seems overly close.
I had the most amazing dinner today. I think it deserves a mention given I won’t shut up about it to the rest of the family. They all had pizza. I had pan fried sea bass. My love for this fish could be considered unhealthy. But its so damn good… I have expensive taste and a new found appreciation for being wheat free 
In honour of Xmas I give you this gift, the gift of little known songs befitting the season. Merry Chrismukkah.
As an aside, All of Wade Johnston’s Christmas Extravaganza should be looked up and enjoyed. Multiple times.
